How To Deal With Transition
Transitions come in many forms, whether that be a new job, moving to a new home, or leaving a relationship, they are all opportunities for us to show up as our best self.
But, as we all know. Transitions, even the good ones, can be really painful.
As someone going through two of the three transitions above, I can tell you that I’ve felt a lot of emotions over the past few weeks including anger, sadness, guilt, happiness, and excitement.
But as I’ve finally turned the corner, I realize the degree to which I over-complicated things. Everything, no matter how challenging the transition, can be simplified by answering these two questions:
What have I always believed about myself that might not be true?
Is life showing me something different?
While I love these questions, what I love more are the moments when we are able to see that something we always thought about ourselves might not be true.
These moments are rare gems.
Most of the time, what we believe about ourselves taints what we see in our lives. If I believe I’m not good enough, I’ll attract people who mirror that. If I believe I’m not smart, all I will see is evidence of that.
That’s the problem with belief, it causes us to notice certain truths, but be blind to others.
It’s very strange when we see something that conflicts with our beliefs. This unique confrontation brings us closer to reality and sets us up for growth.
These moments can happen one of two ways:
- Something conflicts with our beliefs so clearly that we’re hit in the head with a new truth.
- More often, it’s something subtle. To see those, we need to be looking at our lives with a non-defensive magnifying glass. And we must be present enough to see what’s happening right now, rather than seeing stories from our past as they play out in our lives.
“We see nothing as it is now. Our mind is preoccupied with past thoughts.”
So how do we stay awake and present to see our truth?
- It begins with the decision that we are willing to be open and present to life.
- We are willing to do what it takes. We are willing to move slowly enough to actually notice what’s happening around us and not what we believe to be true from our past or what we’d like to be true in the future.
- We have to nourish ourselves with self-love so that we have room to be open to truths that may feel challenging and make us feel vulnerable when we look at them.
When we do that, life can become our teacher. And transition will no longer be our enemy.
Going through a transition? Share your story in the Comments section below!